晚上6点前,Children's Day is coming.I went to zoo with my mum.We went to there buy bus.We saw some animals,such as monkeys,birdies,horses,sheeps and all.I feeds a lot of birdseed to some birdies and I feeds a lot of green grass to some sheeps in t

晚上6点前,Children's Day is coming.I went to zoo with my mum.We went to there buy bus.We saw some animals,such as monkeys,birdies,horses,sheeps and all.I feeds a lot of birdseed to some birdies and I feeds a lot of green grass to some sheeps in t
晚上6点前,
Children's Day is coming.I went to zoo with my mum.We went to there buy bus.
We saw some animals,such as monkeys,birdies,horses,sheeps and all.I feeds a lot of birdseed to some birdies and I feeds a lot of green grass to some sheeps in the zoo.I'm hungry.We intend went home.In the now,it's rain.We walk in the rain.
This Children's Day it was fun and terrible,I hope next Children's Day is wonderful.

晚上6点前,Children's Day is coming.I went to zoo with my mum.We went to there buy bus.We saw some animals,such as monkeys,birdies,horses,sheeps and all.I feeds a lot of birdseed to some birdies and I feeds a lot of green grass to some sheeps in t
Children's Day came.I went to a zoo with my mum.We went there by bus.
We saw some animals,such as monkeys,birds,horses,sheep.I fed a lot of birdseed to some birds and I fed a lot of green grass to some sheep in the zoo.I was hungry.We went home.Then,it rained.We walked in the rain.
This Children's Day was fun and terrible,I hope next Children's Day will be wonderful.
很高兴为你解答!
请及时采纳哦!多谢你的问题!

正确的说法：
.We went there buy bus
We saw some animals,such as monkeys,birdies,horses,sheeps
feeded
birds
now不是in the now

l

zoo前加the ,buy bus 改为by bus ,birdies改为birds,sheeps改为sheep(sheep为集合名词），and all改为and so on ，feeds改为fed （过去式），birdies改为birds，feeds改为fed，sheeps改为sheep
i'm hungry 改为 i was hungry
We intend went hom...

全部展开

zoo前加the ,buy bus 改为by bus ,birdies改为birds,sheeps改为sheep(sheep为集合名词），and all改为and so on ，feeds改为fed （过去式），birdies改为birds，feeds改为fed，sheeps改为sheep
i'm hungry 改为 i was hungry
We intend went home.In the now,it's rain.这句有比较严重的语法错误，可改为 when we were going home ,it began to rain. intend 有明确的计划打算的意思，比较正式，不适合用在这里。
walk 改为 walked
This Children's Day it was fun and terrible,I hope next Children's Day is wonderful.改为
This Children's Day was fun and terrible,I hope next Children's Day will be wonderful.但是fun和terrible放在一起还是比较奇怪，可以改成This Children's Day was not so pleasant
还有啊，小朋友，你要注意时态啦~
祝你六一节快乐

收起