请帮我看看这两句英文哪里要改改,明天就要用了As there is a report says that many workers from some garment factories feel stressful and suffer from respiratory disease because of flax,jute and ramie dusts in the air of the overcrow

请帮我看看这两句英文哪里要改改,明天就要用了As there is a report says that many workers from some garment factories feel stressful and suffer from respiratory disease because of flax,jute and ramie dusts in the air of the overcrow
请帮我看看这两句英文哪里要改改,明天就要用了
As there is a report says that many workers from some garment factories feel stressful and suffer from respiratory disease because of flax,jute and ramie dusts in the air of the overcrowded workplace.
In order to avoid it ,the company should provide an adequate space for employees to work or move around,as well as enough windows which allows fresh air coming in.

请帮我看看这两句英文哪里要改改,明天就要用了As there is a report says that many workers from some garment factories feel stressful and suffer from respiratory disease because of flax,jute and ramie dusts in the air of the overcrow
顺序有点奇怪；
As a report says,there are many workers from garment factories that feel stressful and suffer from respiratory diseases because of flax jute and ramie dusts in the air of the overcrowed workplace.
这一句,开始的顺序应该是：一个报告中所说的（你单词的顺序就像是中文中写“有一个报告说-所说”,意思重复了,所以选了合理一点的as,移动了there is）
有很多在制衣厂中工作的工人（此处你用了many和some两个词,作用上只需要一个,所以选了比较顺口的many）
得了呼吸道疾病（此处疾病应该是多数而不是单数）
In order to avoid it,the company should provide an adequate space for employees to work and move around,as well as enough windows to allow fresh air to come in.
“工作或移动”不太合理,所以改为“工作和移动” (work and move around)
用which不太合理,所以改成to
windows是多数,所以allows改为allow
coming in语法不对,改为to come in

There is a report says that many workers from garment factories feel stressful and suffer from respiratory disease because of flax,jute and ramie dusts in the air of the overcrowded workplace.
<...

全部展开

There is a report says that many workers from garment factories feel stressful and suffer from respiratory disease because of flax,jute and ramie dusts in the air of the overcrowded workplace.

In order to avoid it ,the company should provide an adequate space for employees to work or move around,and also enough windows which allows fresh air to come in.

收起