帮我检查一下我写的英语作文有没有什么问题Do you perfer staying in a place all your life?My answer is:Of course not.Our life is interesting,which is filled with a myriad of different things.We live in this big city.We do many things

帮我检查一下我写的英语作文有没有什么问题Do you perfer staying in a place all your life?My answer is:Of course not.Our life is interesting,which is filled with a myriad of different things.We live in this big city.We do many things
帮我检查一下我写的英语作文有没有什么问题
Do you perfer staying in a place all your life?
My answer is:Of course not.Our life is interesting,which is filled with a myriad of different things.We live in this big city.We do many things and go to almost two places every day:your home and your school.It is forced by the situation in a way,however,I think everybody have their own opinion where the place they desired to go or visit.Maybe less people prefer staying in a place because they're obsessed with computer games or watching televisions.In a word,it is better to do some sports outside than to stay in the same place continuously to waste your time relaxing.
帮我检查一下语法和内容上有没有什么问题,最好再提一点建议,
满分25分的话再帮我打个分吧

帮我检查一下我写的英语作文有没有什么问题Do you perfer staying in a place all your life?My answer is:Of course not.Our life is interesting,which is filled with a myriad of different things.We live in this big city.We do many things
整篇来说,有"we"又有"your",可能会搞得你文章的读者混乱,你究竟是用第一人称还是第二人称?最好整篇文章保持一种人称,除非你是要特显出你和读者之间的不同.
everybody是作为单数的不定代词,所以我建议：
I think everybody have their own opinion where the place they desired to go or visit.
-〉
I think everybody has his/her own opinion about what place he/she desires to go or visit.（或者用where代替what place)
We do many things and go to almost two places every day:your home and your school.
建议改成：
We have many activities to do but almost go between two places only,where are schools and homes.
Maybe less people prefer staying in a place because they're obsessed with computer games or watching televisions."less"用在有比较的时候吧.建议换成"a few"或"some"或...
没有说运动的好处,在总结的时候却忽然说"it is better to do some sports outside than ..."太有跳跃性了吧?
插入建议：
Nevertheless,sport can be fun and helps both our body and our mind to relax,so it makes us healthier.
"waste your time relaxing".relax不能算waste吧?建议改成：to waste our life.改完后又好像说的严重了一点.
最后变成这样：
My answer is:Of course not.Our life is interesting,which is filled with a myriad of different things.We live in this big city.We have many activities to do but almost go between two places only,where are schools and homes.It seems that we are forced by the situation in a way,however,I think everybody has his/her own opinion about what place he/she desires to go or visit.Maybe some people prefer staying in a place because they're obsessed with computer games or watching televisions.Nevertheless,sport can be fun and helps both our body and our mind to relax,so it makes us healthier.In a word,it is better to do some sports outside than to stay in the same place continuously to waste our life.
PS：本人非英文老师或英语为母语的人,所以可能上面会有不少不适合的建议.
刚才看到你的题目：Do you perfer staying in a place all your life?
你写的内容离题了吧?orz
题目问你会不会搬去其他地方之类的,你最后扯到运动来了.囧
你应该对比一下只住在一个地方的好坏和换个新地方居住的好坏,然后总结一下只住一个地方还是换个地方,换种生活方式好.

1.审题有点问题：
Do you perfer staying in a place all your life?
你喜欢一辈子呆在一个地方吗？
Maybe less people prefer staying in a place because they're obsessed with computer games or watching televisions

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1.审题有点问题：
Do you perfer staying in a place all your life?
你喜欢一辈子呆在一个地方吗？
Maybe less people prefer staying in a place because they're obsessed with computer games or watching televisions
此段中的地方是狭义的，是呆在一个地方玩游戏，而不是从一个地方搬迁到另一个地方。
2.everybody have --应改为everybody has
3.your home and your school--应改为our home and our school这样才能与主语we对应。

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我记得我们老师说作文里虽然题目是问句不要用My answer is:Of course not.这样的，你就直接说I don't prefer……，less没有比较级不能直接用，almost不能修饰two,后面一个your可以省略，televisions不能加s,12分吧，有些词用的不合适

你好！我是大侠！原文有两处语法错误，还有少许的语句混乱。稍作更改如下：
My answer is: "Of course not!" Our life is so interesting and colorful.We live in this big city but where we are allowed to go everyday are only two places---ou...

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你好！我是大侠！原文有两处语法错误，还有少许的语句混乱。稍作更改如下：
My answer is: "Of course not!" Our life is so interesting and colorful.We live in this big city but where we are allowed to go everyday are only two places---our home and our school.However, I think everybody has their own choice. Maybe there are fewer people who prefer staying in one place only because they are obsessed with computer games or televisions. In a word, it is better to do some sports outside or make a trip than stay in the same place continuously to waste your time idly.

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