拜托帮我审一下英文讲稿My family uniqueness Today I want to introduce my grandmother as today's topic.My grandmother born on 1930s in a rich family in 嘉义,however her family abandon her due to some superstitions.In the same time,my grea

拜托帮我审一下英文讲稿My family uniqueness Today I want to introduce my grandmother as today's topic.My grandmother born on 1930s in a rich family in 嘉义,however her family abandon her due to some superstitions.In the same time,my grea
拜托帮我审一下英文讲稿
My family uniqueness
  Today I want to introduce my grandmother as today's topic.My grandmother born on 1930s in a rich family in 嘉义,however her family abandon her due to some superstitions.In the same time,my great grandfather walked by the brought my grandma home.In fact,my great grandfather's family was quite poor that time and they even didn't have enough to buy food.What's worse,they even had to borrowed money from other to buy food,and they just couldn't pay off.So my grandmother wasn't easy for her.At her age 13,my grandpa went out for work.However,the salary was far enough for the family's debt and spending.Therefore,my grandmother went salt factory nearby to work; she was too little to afford this work and found by security.And the security said "you are too little to afford this work,just go back home".Because the job required adult labor not child.Nevertheless,she had to went anywhere to find job,my great grandfather was sick and they didn't have money to buy food.Despite of hardship,she still found job ,but it wasn't stable.So she had to change usually.Just one year later,my great grandfather passed away.And few year later,my grandfather and grandma got married.And they have 4 children.Whereas the family still needed money,it was an very hard time for them.
  At her age 38,my great grandmother passed away,and she felt very sad but she didn't have enough money to prepare my great grandmother's funeral.So she had to borrow,and it made family owned much debt than even.To pay the large amount of debt she took her 4 children to Taipei to find job.It was also a turning point for her life.As soon as she step into Taipei,she told to herself that she had be strong and don't let other look down on her and her family.In order to accomplish this goal,she worked vary hard and she even had three jobs in the same time!While the speed of earning money was to slow for her,she join group like small bank.When a group member need money,then he can ask other group member to lend them and he also had to pay interest to them.The interest was higher than real bank but the risk was higher too.It was often heard that people borrow money and they just run away.Though it has high risk,she still used it to help her to paid off all the debt and she even buy three houses.By knowing this story,I realize that "just go to get it and your destiny is mastered by yourself" .
我这礼拜四要上台报告,师说报告时间要超过三分钟但小於四分钟.

拜托帮我审一下英文讲稿My family uniqueness Today I want to introduce my grandmother as today's topic.My grandmother born on 1930s in a rich family in 嘉义,however her family abandon her due to some superstitions.In the same time,my grea
1.小错误(明显的):
on 1930s --> in the 1930s
abandon --> abandoned
in the same time --> at the same time
that time --> at that time
enough --> enough money
borrowed --> borrow
So my grandmother wasn't easy for her --> during that time,my grand mother lived a hard life
at her age --> at the age of
she had to went anywhere to find job--> she had to go everywhere to find a job
Despite of hardship --> Despite the hardship
change usually--> change frequently
few year later --> a few years later
step --> stepped
had be --> had to be
don't let --> not let
she join --> she joins/joined
need money --> needs money
2.题目是My family uniqueness,但实际上讲的是grandmother,有点文不对题,建议改改题目
3.文章反复强调了穷和艰难,但是最好能换一些词,这样显得不重复.比如 hard 用 difficult/tough 代替.
4.时间上,如果你要背稿子的话时间还可以,但是如果你想自由发挥一些而不机械性地背稿子的话,这个就有点超时了.
一些小建议.

hey everyone, today I want to introduce my grandmother as my topic. My grandmother was born on 1930s in a rich family in Jiayi, however her family wanted to abandon her due to some superstitions. In t...

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hey everyone, today I want to introduce my grandmother as my topic. My grandmother was born on 1930s in a rich family in Jiayi, however her family wanted to abandon her due to some superstitions. In the same time, my great grandfather walked by and brought to my grandma home. In fact, my great grandfather's family was quite poor at that time and they even didn't have enough money to buy food. What's worse, they even had to borrow money from others to buy food,although they just couldn't pay off. my grandmother wasn't easy for her. At her age 13, my grandpa went out for work. However, the salary was far enough for the family's debt and spending. Therefore, my grandmother went to salt factory nearby; she was too little to suit this work and later on being found by security. And the security said "you are too little to do this work, please go back home". Because the job required adult labor not child. Nevertheless, she had to went elsewhere to find job, at the meantime, my great grandfather was sick and didn't have enough money to buy food. Despite of hardship, luckily she found a job ,but it wasn't stable.she had to change frequently. one year later, my great grandfather passed away. And few year later, my grandfather and grandma got married. And they have 4 children. Whereas the family still needed money, it was an very hard time for them.
At her age 38,my great grandmother passed away, she felt very sad because she didn't have enough money to prepare my great grandmother's funeral.she had to borrow, and it made family owned much debt than ever. In order to pay the large amount of debt, she took her 4 children to Taipei to find a job. It was also a turning point for her life. As soon as she step into Taipei, she told to herself that she had to be strong and never let other look down on her and her family. In order to accomplish this goal, she worked very hard and even had three jobs in the same time! yet the speed of earning money was still too slow for her, later she joined a group which looks like a small bank. When a group member needs money, he can ask other group member to lend them but he needs to pay interest to them. The interest was higher than real bank and the risk was higher too. It was often hear that once people borrow money,they simply run away. Though it has high risk, she still used it to help her to paid off all the debt and she even buy three houses. By knowing this story, I realize that "just go to get it and your destiny is mastered by yourself" .

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