我写的这句话有语法错误么,Every time he took over newteam,Mourinho memorized everything about hisnew players,including position,style of play,dominant feet,character,age andeven marriage.

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我写的这句话有语法错误么,Everytimehetookovernewteam,Mourinhomemorizedeverythingabouthisnewplayers,includingposit

我写的这句话有语法错误么,Every time he took over newteam,Mourinho memorized everything about hisnew players,including position,style of play,dominant feet,character,age andeven marriage.
我写的这句话有语法错误么,
Every time he took over newteam,Mourinho memorized everything about hisnew players,including position,style of play,dominant feet,character,age andeven marriage.

我写的这句话有语法错误么,Every time he took over newteam,Mourinho memorized everything about hisnew players,including position,style of play,dominant feet,character,age andeven marriage.
every time 作为副词短语时,意为"always, at all times（每次,总是）,应该使用一般现在时态.建议改为：Every time he takes over a new team, Mourinho will memorize everthing...

中国人学英语最大的问题有语法问题，句子结构问题以及用词不当问题。。你这个句子，都占全了。。

memorize用的不当，应该是考虑不应该是回想，his new players用的我觉得不当，new players 不是属于他的。后面的including带的词组有复数的要复数。