7人英文版搞笑小品剧本谁有?

7人英文版搞笑小品剧本谁有?
7人英文版搞笑小品剧本谁有?

7人英文版搞笑小品剧本谁有?
三打白骨精的英文剧本,我演过,相当成功,（人物可删减的）
人物：T唐僧 S：孙悟空 E：猪八戒 J：沙僧
B：白骨精 B1：B变成的村姑 B2：B变成的太婆
B3：B变化成的老头 N：哪吒
T:Emitofo,do you know where we are now?
S:Bajie,map!
E:(摸出,递给S)
S:Look,master (凑近T)………(T、S一齐转向E)
T:Bajie!How Many times I have told you,nof to bring these pictures of beautiful girls with you!
E:Oh,master!Forgive me(伸手拿回)
T:(缩手)I’ll keep it for you until we reach the west
E:But……
T:Emitofo,nothing is lust,lust is nothing!Map?
E:(递)Here.Em…… we have arrived in White Tiger Mountain!Ah I can’t walk on any more!(坐)My stomach doesn’t allow So.
S:Fat Pig!
E:Monkey,if you dare to say these two words once again,I will ,I will……….
S:You will what(凶相)?
E:(软禁)I will help you catch fleas(跳蚤).
S:Hm!
T:(轻咳)Wukong,factually,I am a bit hungry Could you go to get me some food?
E:You see ,master is hungry,too!
T:Baijie!Don’t forget who ate my last meal!
J:But master,if a monster comes while brother monkeg is away…..
T:Em…….It is a problem.Wukong,do you have any idea?
S:No problem!(安装)(B已躲在一旁偷看)
E:This is…..
S:Electric net!I have learnt the energy of electricity from master’s books.So I made this.No monster can approach you if you stay in it!
T:Em……Wukong,you are becoming more and more scientific!Emitofo,knowledge is power!
S:Bye!(走)
T:Let’s play cards!(三人开始打牌)音乐《斗地主》
B:Hm!Hm!Electric net?You are too childish.(变成B1)
B1:(接近三人,望着)Can I join you?
T:I’m sorry,lady.We are playing Fighting Against Landlord and three people are enough.
B1:(在一旁观看)Oh,Chance!Bomb!
T:Bomb?(打出)
B1:Double King!
T:Oh….I win!Em……,Lady,you are a master-hand.Come in and teach me!(准备开电网门)
S:(回来,看见B1)Oh,monster!(上前就打)
B1:(倒)Ah……
T:(气愤)Wukong!Look what have done!She is my teacher!
S:She is a monster!
T:Nonsense!(深呼吸)
S:Oh,please don’t……
T:It’s too late!(唱)Once more……you open the door…(泰坦尼克主题曲,走音离谱)
S:Please,Please,oh,no……(痛苦抱头)
T:(呛住,咳)Wukong,I’m disappointed with you!
B:(真身出现)Hm!Sun Wukong,I’ll teach you a lesson!(变成太婆)
B2:Hello,have you seen my daughter?
T:Daughter?...(连忙挡住地尸体)No,sorry!(陪笑,B2想看后面是什么,T挡)
S:(咬牙切齿)You monster,I’ll beat you into hell!(S追打B2,B2躲至T身后,S打,不想打到T头,T晕,S再打死B2)
E&J:Are you Ok,master?(扶T)
J:Look,(伸食指)how many?
T:Two…..(晕乎乎地)Sun Wukong,game over!(变成B3)
B3:(看到B1,B2尸体)Oh….,my daughter,my wife!Who did it?!(哭喊)
S:I’ll kill you,monster!(打)
T:(想阻止,未及)You,you.(险些晕,E,J扶住 )You have killed three lives!
S:No,they are not human beings!They are created by monster!
T:Monster?You are a real monster!Never let me see you,go!
S:(悲,离去)(音乐,营造 “假”悲伤气氛)《人鬼情未了》
E:Master,brother Monkey is.
T:Scratch!Don't mention that guy any more!
B:(出现) Ha,ha,ha!(三尸体B1,B2,B3在B招手后“飘”走)
T:(惊)You are.
B:How foolish you are ,Mr Tang!(E,J去阻斗,被击退)
B:(抓住T)I'll enjoy your meat and blood,ha,ha.
S:(悄悄走到B后,打B,B晕)A thousand years later.
T:Wukong?
E:Oh,Brother Monkey!
J:Our hero is back!
T:I,I can't understand.What happened?
S:Master,your IQ needs increasing!This monster changed its appearance into three shapes in order to cheat you!
T:How,how did you find out?
S:(沉默).Monkey's intuition(直觉)
N:Excuse me,where is the cniminal?
S; Ah.you are too late ,Nezha!(对T)I've called the police.
N:(摇醒B)You are under arrest .(出示证件)You have the right to remain silent If you give up the right,anything you will say can and will be against you in a court of law!(带走B)
T:Wukong(S不理T)I admit my mistake this time(S仍不理)I'm sorry(小声)
S:What?
T:I'm sorry.
S:Em?Louder,please?
T:I.am.sorry.(S 捂耳)(音乐响)《敢问路在何方》(这个放伴奏)
T:Let's go guys!( 歌)
S:You are carrying the luggage,I am leading the horse.
E:Say goodbye to the sun,Welcome evening glow.
J:Sleeping on the ground,again we set out set out,again we set out.
T.S.E.J:Ah.Ah.Sleeping on the ground again we set out.
T:One after the other the seasons go by,and ohe after the other,the year go on.You wonder where the road is.The road is under your feet.
T.S.E.J:You uonder where the road is,the road is under your feet.