帮忙看看下面这短文有没有什么错误,不要挑太刁钻的Dear XXX,I am XXXX.I was so regretful about my employment,cause i didn't make it well for my nervous.Please give me the chance to make self introduction again.My name is XXX,a stud

帮忙看看下面这短文有没有什么错误,不要挑太刁钻的Dear XXX,I am XXXX.I was so regretful about my employment,cause i didn't make it well for my nervous.Please give me the chance to make self introduction again.My name is XXX,a stud
帮忙看看下面这短文有没有什么错误,不要挑太刁钻的
Dear XXX,I am XXXX.I was so regretful about my employment,cause i didn't make it well for my nervous.Please give me the chance to make self introduction again.
My name is XXX,a student in XXXU.My major is sience of electronic.I am really good at Physics and math,and I also make achievement in this two subjects.I think I am a responsible and patient people,who can get along well with others.
As has been metion above,I'm eager for this work.Last but not least,this job,what really atracts me is the educational experience,not the money.I think it makes no difference to me that whether this job is well-paid or not and i just want this experience.
I hope you can give me the chance to make it!Thank you!

帮忙看看下面这短文有没有什么错误,不要挑太刁钻的Dear XXX,I am XXXX.I was so regretful about my employment,cause i didn't make it well for my nervous.Please give me the chance to make self introduction again.My name is XXX,a stud
第一行cause是名词,这里应该是连接词,左上应该有个省文撇；make it well for my nervous中nervous应该是名词形式,应改为nervousness.As has been metion above中metion应为被动,加ed；this job,what really atracts me is the educational experience,not the money.这句少谓语,可以改为what really attracts me in this job is the educational experience,not the money.

亲爱的XXX，我是XXXX。我对我的工作很遗憾，因为我没有让我紧张。请给我机会再做自我介绍。我的名字是XXX，在xxxu学生。我的专业是学电子。我真的很擅长数学和物理，和我也在这两个科目的成绩。我认为我是一个有耐心的人，谁能与人相处的很好。如已经提到，我渴望这份工作。最后但并非最不重要的，这项工作，真正atracts我是教育的经验，而不是金钱。我想它对我来说没什么区别，无论这工作薪水很高或不，我只...

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亲爱的XXX，我是XXXX。我对我的工作很遗憾，因为我没有让我紧张。请给我机会再做自我介绍。我的名字是XXX，在xxxu学生。我的专业是学电子。我真的很擅长数学和物理，和我也在这两个科目的成绩。我认为我是一个有耐心的人，谁能与人相处的很好。如已经提到，我渴望这份工作。最后但并非最不重要的，这项工作，真正atracts我是教育的经验，而不是金钱。我想它对我来说没什么区别，无论这工作薪水很高或不，我只想这经验。我希望你能给我这个机会让我！谢谢！
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第三行第二句：a student in XXXU→i'm a student of XXXU.第三句：把really去掉更好
第四行：and I also make achievement in this two subjects→and i have made achievement on the both subject。I think 后加that,句尾people 去掉，people是复数