30秒的英语故事只要三十秒,类似小笑话之类的二十分钟内给我的私下必感谢!

30秒的英语故事只要三十秒,类似小笑话之类的二十分钟内给我的私下必感谢!
30秒的英语故事
只要三十秒,类似小笑话之类的
二十分钟内给我的私下必感谢!

30秒的英语故事只要三十秒,类似小笑话之类的二十分钟内给我的私下必感谢!
He Won
Tommy:How is your little brother,Johnny?Johnny:He is ill in bed.He hurt himself.
Tommy:That's too bad.How did that happen?
Johnny:We played who could lean furthest out of the window,and he won.
他赢了
汤姆：约翰尼,你小弟弟好吗?
约翰尼：他害病卧床了.他受了伤.
汤姆：真糟糕,怎么回事儿?
约翰尼：我们做游戏,看谁能把身子探出窗外最远,他赢了.
I Have His Ear in My Pocket
Ivan came home with a bloody nose and his mother asked,"What happened?"
"A kid bit me," replied Ivan.
"Would you recognize him if you saw him again?" asked his mother.
"I'd know him any where," said Ivan."I have his ear in my pocket."
他的耳朵在我衣兜里
伊凡鼻子流着血回到家里.他妈妈问,“发生了什么事?”
“一个男孩咬了我一口,”伊凡说.
“再见到他你能认出来吗?”妈妈问.
“他走到哪里我都能认出他,”伊凡说.“他的耳朵还在我衣兜里呢.”
A Good Boy
Little Robert asked his mother for two cents."What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?"
"I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered.
"You're a good boy," said the mother proudly."Here are two cents more.But why are you so interested in the old woman?"
"She is the one who sells the candy."
好孩子
小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱.
“昨天给你的钱干什么了?”
“我给了一个可怜的老太婆,”他回答说.“你真是个好孩子,”妈妈骄傲地说.“再给你两分钱.可你为什么对那位老太太那么感兴趣呢?”
“她是个卖糖果的.”
Drunk
One day,a father and his little son were going home.At this age,the boy was interested in all kinds of things and was always asking questions.Now,he asked,"What's the meaning of the word 'Drunk',dad?" "Well,my son," his father replied,"look,there are standing two policemen.If I regard the two policemen as four then I am drunk."
"But,dad," the boy said," there's only ONE policeman!"
醉酒
一天,父亲与小儿子一道回家.这个孩子正处于那种对什么事都很感兴趣的年龄,老是有提不完的问题.他向父亲发问道：“爸爸,” “唔,孩子,”父亲回答说,“你瞧那儿站着两个警察.如果我把他们看成了四个,那么我就算醉了.” “可是,爸爸,”孩子说,“那儿只有一个警察呀!”
Hospitality
The hostess apologized to her unexpected guest for serving an apple-pie without any cheese.The little boy of the family left the room quietly for a moment and returned with a piece of cheese which he laid on the guest's plate.The visitor smiled,put the cheese into his mouth and then said:"You must have better eyes than your mother,sonny.Where did you find the cheese?" "In the rat-trap,sir," replied the boy.
好客
由于客人在吃苹果馅饼时,家里没有奶酪了,于是女主人向大家表示歉意.这家的小男孩悄悄地离开了屋子.过了一会儿,他拿着一片奶酪回到房间,把奶酪放在客人的盘子里.客人微笑着把奶酪放进嘴里说：“孩子,你的眼睛就是比你妈妈的好.你在哪里找到的奶酪?” “在捕鼠夹上,先生.”那小男孩说.

1. Two birds（ 两只鸟）
Teacher: Here are two birds, one is a swallow, the other is sparrow. Now who can tell us which is which? （老师： 这儿有两只鸟，一只是麻雀。谁能指出哪只是燕子，哪只是麻雀吗？）
Student: I cannot point out b...

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1. Two birds（ 两只鸟）
Teacher: Here are two birds, one is a swallow, the other is sparrow. Now who can tell us which is which? （老师： 这儿有两只鸟，一只是麻雀。谁能指出哪只是燕子，哪只是麻雀吗？）
Student: I cannot point out but I know the answer. （学生：我指不出，但我知道答案。）
Teacher: Please tell us. （老师：请说说看。）
Student: The swallow is beside the sparrow and the sparrow is beside the swallow.(学生：燕子旁边的就是麻雀，麻雀旁边的就是燕子。)

2. Baby Rabbit: Mommy, where did I come from?
兔宝宝：妈咪，我是从哪儿来的呢？
Mother Rabbit: I'll tell you when you're older.
兔妈妈：等你长大点再告诉你。
Baby Rabbit: Oh, Mommy, please, tell me now.
兔宝宝：噢妈咪，现在就告诉我吧，求您了。
Mother Rabbit: If you must know, you were pulled from a magician's hat.
兔妈妈：如果你一定要知道，那我告诉你你是从魔术师的帽子里被拽出来的。

3. A Good Boy 好孩子
Little Robert asked his mother for two cents. (小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。)
"What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?" (“昨天给你的钱干什么了？”)
"I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered. (“我给了一个可怜的老太婆，”他回答说。)
"You're a good boy," said the mother proudly. "Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?" ( “你真是个好孩子，”妈妈骄傲地说。“再给你两分钱。可你为什么对那位老太太那么感兴趣呢？”)
"She is the one who sells the candy." (“她是个卖糖果的。”)

4. How much English can you speak? (你会说多少英文？）
"Your Honor, I want to bring to your attention how unfair it is for my client to be accused of theft. He arrived in New York City a week ago and barely knew his way around. What's more, he only speaks a few words of English."
The judge looked at the defendant and asked, "How much English can you speak?"
The defendant looked up and said, "Give me your wallet!"
中文翻译：
"法官先生，我的当事人被指控偷窃，这是多么不公正啊。他一周前才来到纽约，几乎不认路。而且，他只会说几个英语单词。"
法官看了看被告，问道："你会说多少英文？"
被告抬起头，说："把你的钱包给我！"

5、
“Tom, what's the matter with your brother?" asked the mother in the kitchen. "He's crying."
"Oh, nothing, Mum," replied Tom. "I'm eating my cake. He is crying because I won't give him any."
"But has he finished his own cake?"
"Yes." said Tom. "And he also cried when I was helping him finish that."
中文翻译：
"汤姆，你弟弟怎么了？" 妈妈在厨房里问。"他在哭。"
"没事儿，妈妈，" 汤姆答道。"我在吃我的蛋糕。他哭是因为我不给他吃。"
"他已经吃完自己的了么？"
"是的。" "我帮他吃完时，他也哭了。"
6、
A guy says to his friend, "Guess how many coins I have in my pocket."
The friends says, "If I guess right, will you give me one of them?"
The first guys says, "If you guess right, I'll give you both of them!"
路人甲对路人乙说，"猜猜我兜里有几个子儿？"
路人乙说："我猜对了，你能给我一个不？"
路人甲说："你要猜对了，我两个全部给你！"

7、
Looking very unhappy, a poor man entered a doctor's consulting-room.
"Doctor," he said, "you must help me. I swallowed a penny about a month ago."
"Good heavens, man!" said the doctor. "Why have you waited so long? Why don't you come to me on the day you swallowed it?"
"To tell you the truth, Doctor," the poor man replied, "I didn't need the money so badly then."
中文翻译：
一个看起来很难受的穷人走进大夫的诊室。
"大夫！"他说，"帮帮我！一个月前我吞了一分硬币！"
"天哪，"大夫说，"早干嘛去了？你当时怎么不来看？"
"实话告诉您吧，大夫，"穷人说，"我当时还不缺钱！"

8、In an entrance examination of a conservatory of music, a teacher asked one of the boys, "What is the most important physiological quality of a musician?"
"To be deaf," replied the boy.
"Nonsense!" said the teacher angrily.
"Why, sir! Don't you know that the famous musician Beethoven was deaf?" the boy asked in reply disdainfully.
中文翻译：
在一次音乐学院的入学考试中，老师问其中一个男孩："音乐家最重要的生理素质是什么？"
"耳聋，"男孩答道。
"胡说！"老师气愤地说。
"怎么了，先生！难道您不知道大名鼎鼎的音乐家贝多芬是个聋子吗？"男孩轻蔑地反问道。

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