求英语达人纠正下小文章里的错误第一次写英语日志,语法,表达都不是很准确,希望英语达人给与正确的改正,MaybeNot only I hate English,but also I tried writing my first English log.虽然讨厌英语,但是我还

求英语达人纠正下小文章里的错误第一次写英语日志,语法,表达都不是很准确,希望英语达人给与正确的改正,MaybeNot only I hate English,but also I tried writing my first English log.虽然讨厌英语,但是我还
求英语达人纠正下小文章里的错误
第一次写英语日志,语法,表达都不是很准确,希望英语达人给与正确的改正,MaybeNot only I hate English,but also I tried writing my first English log.虽然讨厌英语,但是我还是试着写了我的第一篇英语日志.These years,I had been feeling too more that I contantly telled myself: This's grown up with me.这些年,我的感受太多了,并且我经常告诉自己：这对我是种成长.I'm very sure of your thought when I found your evade for me over and over again.我十分确定你的想法,当我发现你总是反复逃避我.You're good girl,I kown your meant.You don't hope I going on with like this.你是个好女孩,我知道你的意思.你不希望我继续这样下去.But,if you are to me,how would you do?但是,如果你是我,I just need a charge of care for you,pay not must to have results.我仅仅需要个关心你的机会,付出不一定需要回报的.I'm the most afraid of than you hate me.I need no more,just only wanna care for you.我最怕的就是你会讨厌我.我需要的不多,只是想要关心你而已.Maybe your happiness isn't me,but my happiness is looking at your happiness.也许你的幸福不是我,但我的幸福只是看着你幸福.So,please don't evaded me good or not?所以,请不要再逃避我了好不好?

求英语达人纠正下小文章里的错误第一次写英语日志,语法,表达都不是很准确,希望英语达人给与正确的改正,MaybeNot only I hate English,but also I tried writing my first English log.虽然讨厌英语,但是我还
首先,楼主我要说一下,你这个简直就是直接翻译过来的吧!GOOD OR NOT 这玩意儿都出来了额……【扶额,正色】
逗号句点后面要空格~
我帮楼主在原文上改了改,有点懒,直接复制的……
顺比啊加了点个人语句,更华丽~更肉麻~【开玩笑的哈哈~
还有整片文章时态要一致,楼主这篇是过去式.
Even though I hate English,but I tried to write my first English log.（不知楼主想表达的“日志”是什么类型的,所以楼主可以追问）These years,I had been feel too much that I constantly tell myself:this was a grown up to me.I was very sure about your thoughts when I found that your evade me over and over again.You're a good girl.I kewn what you meant：You don't want me to keep on going like this.（GOOD可以改成更好的形容词如fantastic;perfect;sweet ,这句我大改,楼主词不达意）But,if you were me,what will you do?（关于这句话,我觉得怎么说都是很不礼貌的,楼主深思,反问句看着很难受,或者说请站在我的角度思考） I just concerned a lot on you,you don't need to give me a clear answer.（大改,大意：我只是很关心你,你不用给我一个明确的回答） I was afraid to lost you.I don't need much,just want to watch you.（这句怪怪的,你关心是你付出了,那句 我不要太多 这句话太多余.大意：我害怕失去你.我不要太多,只想看着你.） Maybe I'm not your love,but when I was watching you,I really feel the love that came from my heart .（中国文化语言果然博大精深,用英文我实在是没法翻译这句话,照葫芦画瓢写了句,大意：我知道你不在意我,但是我爱/喜欢你,你是我的爱）So,don't evade me any more,please and okay?
嗯嗯大概就这样~
其实我觉得可以多加几句,但是个人意见不好说~
不过话说回来,这（情书?）是写给外国人的?
要这么一些写给她了,不就是赤果果的表白嘛!那人家更躲着你了.
要真是外国人,真要当心了~
楼主不懂追问~
不好意思留言发消息~

not only 后要用倒装 应改为Not only do i ....还有是I am tired最好用 i have been feeling too much ....tell myself ....when i find you evade me ...you are a good girl, i know what do you -mean.you don't hope me to go...

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not only 后要用倒装 应改为Not only do i ....还有是I am tired最好用 i have been feeling too much ....tell myself ....when i find you evade me ...you are a good girl, i know what do you -mean.you don't hope me to go on like this but if you were me,what would you do?I just need a chance to care for you;paying is not for definet getting.what i am afraid of the most is that you may hate me.what i need is not too much, i just want to care for you. 。So,please don't evaded me any more.

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比较不通顺，还是多看看简单的文章，学学语法，慢慢就好了；即便给你改好这一篇，你还是不能提高，呵呵，努力学习吧 ；