谁能帮个忙?帮我改改这篇文章,改的通顺一点,哪有错误纠正一下!最好能告诉我错的原因,My impression of the beachThe first time when I went to the beach was few months ago.It was a fine and cloudless day in summer.There h

谁能帮个忙?帮我改改这篇文章,改的通顺一点,哪有错误纠正一下!最好能告诉我错的原因,My impression of the beachThe first time when I went to the beach was few months ago.It was a fine and cloudless day in summer.There h
谁能帮个忙?帮我改改这篇文章,改的通顺一点,哪有错误纠正一下!最好能告诉我错的原因,
My impression of the beach
The first time when I went to the beach was few months ago.It was a fine and cloudless day in summer.There had a small forest encircled the beach,looked like a group of strong guards guarded a rich treasure.I felt dazzling suddenly when I passed through the shadow of the guards to the air into my eyes and shone on the sand and the sea.As I could hear the sound of some seagulls were coming from the front,when I looked forward,I could see three seagulls were playing on a piece of dry wood.They were singing,welcoming the people who came to visit this beach.
I closed my eyes gently,and stood on the beach.I stretched both of my arms and the sea breeze gently stroked my skin when my foot stepped on the silver sand.The cool sea waves flushed and carried the sand to cover my foot.At the moment,it made me feel that I was just like the sea and the breeze that integrated into the nature.Bark of a black Germen Shepherd Dog which with a young pretty lady.The dog was jumping and running around that lady who had a sweet smile on her face.A group of family member sat a circle in the shadow of a tree.Laugh and splash from the people who frolicked and swam in the sea near the beach.
Winter brings coldness and desolate.The dark clouds swim slowly across the sun.The sunlight peek through out from the thick clouds.The beach is dusky gold at the moment.I can hear the sound of the tree being washed through by the breeze of the sea.Light scent of the sea in the breeze.The wind turns stronger as the wave continually hits the beach.The rain becomes stronger and stronger when the sky turned dimmer.
I fleetly run to under a roof of a wooden house.The pit-a-pit of the rain on the roof.I wear a thick black coat and wrap myself tightly,but I also feel a little bit cold.There is no other body,the only person is I.When I stare the rain,I feel lonely.I wonder how my feeling will be if I stand there with my relatives or my lover.The rain stops soon and the rainbow appears under the sunshine on the sky.I hear a whisper of a pair of old husband and wife stroll along on a path near the beach.They hand in hand and fall in the happiness.

谁能帮个忙?帮我改改这篇文章,改的通顺一点,哪有错误纠正一下!最好能告诉我错的原因,My impression of the beachThe first time when I went to the beach was few months ago.It was a fine and cloudless day in summer.There h
1）There had（用there be,表存在,have是指人拥有） a small forest encircled the beach（森林被海滩包围?）, looked （这样有被动的意思,直接用like,介词短语）like a group of strong guards guarded （被动?过去分词表被动,现在分词表主动）a rich treasure.
2）to the air into my eyes ?
3）"what" shone on the sand and the sea,这个长句子把三层意思放在一起了,
4）As I heard the sound of some seagulls coming from the front, I looked forward, I saw three seagulls playing on a piece of dry wood. （hear/see sb doing结构）
5). At the moment, it (,which)made me feel that I was just like the sea and the breeze (that去掉,要么加was) integrated into the nature.
6）Bark of a black Germen Shepherd Dog which with a young pretty lady. （不成句）
7）Laugh and splash ...没动词
8）I fleetly run to（v.) under a roof of a wooden house.