1991年考研作文(请帮助修改错误)Direction:A.Title:WHERE TO LIVE---IN THE CITY OR THE COUNTRY?B.Time limit:40 minutesC.Word limit:120-150 words (not including the given opening sentence)D.Your composition should be based on the OUTLINE b

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1991年考研作文(请帮助修改错误)Direction:A.Title:WHERETOLIVE---INTHECITYORTHECOUNTRY?B.Timelimit:40minutesC.Wordl

1991年考研作文(请帮助修改错误)Direction:A.Title:WHERE TO LIVE---IN THE CITY OR THE COUNTRY?B.Time limit:40 minutesC.Word limit:120-150 words (not including the given opening sentence)D.Your composition should be based on the OUTLINE b
1991年考研作文(请帮助修改错误)
Direction:
A.Title:WHERE TO LIVE---IN THE CITY OR THE COUNTRY?
B.Time limit:40 minutes
C.Word limit:120-150 words (not including the given opening sentence)
D.Your composition should be based on the OUTLINE below and should start with the given opening sentence.
E.Your composition must be written clearly in the ANSWER SHEET.
OUTLINE:
1.Conveniences of the city Attractions of the country
2.Disadvantages of both My preference
Where to Live---in the City or the Country?
With the development of economy,the city,which is the centre of economic growing and modern civilization ,is becoming more vital ever.Therefore,people in a mounting number settle in the city,for a great many chances to get highly-paid jobs,for a variety of methods of travel,for schools with sufficient materials for children,and so on.
But some people,on the contrary,prefer living in the country,where they may have to spend hours on just going to work.It seems such an unconvenience,but those people may ask like this," where could you find an apartment with such silent nights in the city?where could you find a park with such fresh air in the city?"
Indeed,the city is becoming a crowd as an increasingly number of habitants occupying its limited capacity,while the country,where even buying groceries probably cost a whole morning,isn't habitable ,at least for now.
For me,living in the city is more suitable,as there is no need affording a car or waiting a bus for half an hour here!
请帮助评分,和修改错误,非常非常感谢了!
(满分十五分)

1991年考研作文(请帮助修改错误)Direction:A.Title:WHERE TO LIVE---IN THE CITY OR THE COUNTRY?B.Time limit:40 minutesC.Word limit:120-150 words (not including the given opening sentence)D.Your composition should be based on the OUTLINE b
首句就···不地道···
经济发展,我觉得还是economic development好··
1.With the economic development ,as the centre of economic growth and modern civilization ,city is playing an increasing important role in our daily life .
2.Therefore,more and more people settled in cities,with the reasons that there more chances to get high-paid jobs (well-paid ),more methods to travel ,together with sufficient material for student to go to school ,and so on .
···
后面很通顺啊··

修改好的作文:
With the development of economy, the city, which is the core of economic development and civilization's cultivation, is becoming more vital ever. Therefore, people in a mounting numb...

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修改好的作文:
With the development of economy, the city, which is the core of economic development and civilization's cultivation, is becoming more vital ever. Therefore, people in a mounting number settle in the city, for a great many chances to get highly-paid jobs, for a variety of methods of travel, for schools with sufficient materials for children, and so on.
But some people, on the contrary, prefer living in the country, where they may have to spend hours on just going to work. It seems such an inconvenience, but those people may ask like this," where could you find an apartment with so silent nights in the city? Where could you find a park with such fresh air in the city?"
Indeed, the city is becoming a crowd as an increasingly numerous habitats occupying its limited capacity, while the country, where even buying groceries probably spend a whole morning, isn't habitable, at least for now.
For me, living in the city is more suitable, as there is no need affording a car or waiting for a bus for half an hour here!
修改后:15分评分的话是:12.8分
修改前:15分评分的话是:11.7分

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