请大家帮忙修改其中的错误,或换用更好的句型I am an ordinary college student in Jiangsu Province,China.I chose a college in my hometown because a lot of things.Most of my classmates live in the dormitories of the college.However,I li

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请大家帮忙修改其中的错误,或换用更好的句型IamanordinarycollegestudentinJiangsuProvince,China.Ichoseacollegeinmyhometownbe

请大家帮忙修改其中的错误,或换用更好的句型I am an ordinary college student in Jiangsu Province,China.I chose a college in my hometown because a lot of things.Most of my classmates live in the dormitories of the college.However,I li
请大家帮忙修改其中的错误,或换用更好的句型
I am an ordinary college student in Jiangsu Province,China.I chose a college in my hometown because a lot of things.Most of my classmates live in the dormitories of the college.However,I live in my house.Every day in the morning,I must get up at 6:30.Then,it will takes me 45 minutes to ride to the college by bike.There are four lessons in the morning.After the meal,I have the only chance to chat with my classmates.The lessons in the afternoon will finished at 3:30.It had been 4:30 when I get back home.Then,I try to learn something about English and computer.After the supper,I will do some reading.I think the life is very tedious.And I feel a little lonely.

请大家帮忙修改其中的错误,或换用更好的句型I am an ordinary college student in Jiangsu Province,China.I chose a college in my hometown because a lot of things.Most of my classmates live in the dormitories of the college.However,I li
I am an ordinary college student in Jiangsu Province,China.I chose a college in my hometown because of a lot of factors. Most of my classmates live in the dormitories while I live in my home. In every morning, I must get up at 6:30.Then,it will takes me 45 minutes to the college by bike.There are four lessons in the morning.After lunch,I get the only chance to chat with my classmates.The lessons in the afternoon will be finished at 3:30.
It will be 4:30 when I get back home. Then,I try to learn something about English and computer.After supper,I will do some reading.I think the life is very tedious.And I feel a little lonely.
建议楼主掌握下定冠词的用法,发现你基本上都要用the,这不是个好习惯.你的句式用的都比较简单,就不帮你一一改正,毕竟这是你的文章.

第二行,because of a lot of things
第三行,everyday;it takes me
第五行,The lessons in the afternoon finishat 3:30;It has been 4:30 when I get home.
第六行,I do some reading

because (of) a lot of things
it (will去掉) takes
ride to the college (by bike 去掉,重复了)
The lessons in the afternoon (finish) at 3:30
By the time i get back home, it's 4:30 already
learn something (on)
After supper
I (will去掉)do some reading

because -because of
takes -take
ride to the college by bike.-get tothe college by bike或者ride to the college
finished- be finished
had-has
I think the life is very tedious.And I feel a little lonely中the改成that

because后跟句子 will后就不用用一般现在时了 ride 与by
bicycle 不能一起用

I chose a college in my hometown because a lot of things.
改成I have chosen a college in my hometown because of a lot of reasons.
I live in my house.
应说I live in my home.表示住在自己家。如果你是要强调房子的话应...

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I chose a college in my hometown because a lot of things.
改成I have chosen a college in my hometown because of a lot of reasons.
I live in my house.
应说I live in my home.表示住在自己家。如果你是要强调房子的话应说I live in my own house 表示自己的房子。
Every day in the morning, I must get up at 6:30.
改成Every morning, I have to get up at 6:30
Then,it will takes me ……
把then去掉,改成 It takes me……,表示一般通常的情况
There are four lessons in the morning
把lessons改成classes,lessons表示课本中的课,classes表示上课的“课”
The lessons in the afternoon will finished at 3:30
同样把lessons换成classes。把后面的will去掉,把finished改成finishes,表示每天通常的情况。
It had been 4:30 when I get back home.
改成It reaches 4:30 already when I get home.这句里不适合用完成时。因为你整篇文章叙述的都是你日常的生活,而不是某一天发生的某一件事。所以应统一用一般现在时。还有后面的get back home一般是指回家这件事。而get home表示到家
I will do some reading 去掉will
其他就没有什么问题了

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I am an ordinary college student in Jiangsu province, China. I chose to study in a college in my hometown for a coulpe of reasons. Presently, most of my classmates are living in the dormitories on cam...

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I am an ordinary college student in Jiangsu province, China. I chose to study in a college in my hometown for a coulpe of reasons. Presently, most of my classmates are living in the dormitories on campus;however,I live in my own house. Every day in the morning, I have to get up early at 6:30, and then, it takes me 45 minutes to go to the college by bike. Usually, I have four classes in the morning. Only after lunch, I have got the chance to talk with my classmates. The classes in the afternoon are over at 3:30, and I get home at around 4:30. After that, I
would like to learn something concerning English and computer. After dinner, I normally do some readings. Here is my life, which I think is very routine and somewhat tedious. I feel a little lonely about that.
建议句与句之间用恰当衔接词;一些用词不够准确,e.g.lesson是课程,平时上课,应是class;时态用错,这是个大问题。

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because 后跟句子
because of 后跟名词

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