求英语短剧的剧本!中文的也可以,我自己来翻译.最好是英文.我是初二的,所以不要很难的!4个人,三男一女.要有幽默和内涵的!最好能在某个地方能插歌曲进去,歌曲我来找.人数只有4人！

求英语短剧的剧本!中文的也可以,我自己来翻译.最好是英文.我是初二的,所以不要很难的!4个人,三男一女.要有幽默和内涵的!最好能在某个地方能插歌曲进去,歌曲我来找.人数只有4人！
求英语短剧的剧本!
中文的也可以,我自己来翻译.最好是英文.我是初二的,所以不要很难的!4个人,三男一女.要有幽默和内涵的!最好能在某个地方能插歌曲进去,歌曲我来找.
人数只有4人！

求英语短剧的剧本!中文的也可以,我自己来翻译.最好是英文.我是初二的,所以不要很难的!4个人,三男一女.要有幽默和内涵的!最好能在某个地方能插歌曲进去,歌曲我来找.人数只有4人！
Characters:(In the order of appearance)
Jerry as Michael (M)
Li as Alex (A)
Mark as Chris (C)
Vincent as Waiter (W)
The three emotions we express in this play:victorious,disgusted and confused
SCENE 1
(In the Railway Station)
M:Alex,Chris!You are back!
A&C:Michael!Oh,thank you for picking us here.We're so glad to see you!
M:Me too.Congratulations to your victory in the national final competition!It must be an exciting moment when you heard that you get the golden medals,isn't it?
A:Yes.I just can't believe that we defeated all other competitors!Right,Chris?
C:Yes,it was really amazing.You know,just in one second,you became the winner,and you became the elite.It happened so sudden that I wondered whether I was dreaming.
M:Well,you guys will soon find that you're not dreaming.Now you're the idols of all the students in the university!I think you can attend the American Idol now!
A:Oh,please,I don't want to be idol…
C:(Interrupt):Yes,because you're not an American idol,you're just "Alex idiot".
A:Hey,Chris!(All of them laugh)
M:Ok,guys,it's getting late.You must be hungry after 23-hours trip.What about going to have dinner first?
C:That sounds great to me.What about you,Alex?
A:I'm starving.Let's go.
SCENE 2
(In the restaurant)
A:We've sit here for five minutes,and no waiter comes!
M:Come on,Alex,have patience.Maybe they're just too busy to serve us.
C:Really?I don't think they're busy.Look at those two waiters,they're laughing,but not working!Hey!You!Come here!(A second) Please bring us the menus.
W:OK,sir.Here you are,sir.
A:You see,we have three people here.Can you bring two more menus for us?
W:Sorry,sir.We don't have extra menus.
C:Oh,you don't?Then what's that?(Point to the other table) Don't tell me that's not menu.
W:It is,sir.But it belongs to that table.M:But we can't see anyone having dinner there.
W:Yes,but…
C:Don't say any "but" to me.Now,you bring the menus to us,or we bring the complaints to your boss.
W:OK,here you are,sir.
(They order the food)
SCENE 3
(30 minutes later)
A:I'm starving!Where's our food?Waiter!
W:Yes,sir?
M:We give the order 30 minutes ago,but nothing is served still.Can you ask the kitchen to cook faster?
W:Oh,they cook fast,very fast.But your food is not easy to cook,it needs more time.You should be patience.
C:We should be patience?Yes,we are patience,we are patience enough to wait for the mother pig giving birth to the baby pig,we are patience enough to wait for the baby pig growing up,and we are patience enough to wait for the grown pig being killed and becoming my pork steak!Now,give you five minutes.If we can't see our food in five minutes,we will give our patience to another better-served restaurant!
W:OK,sir.Please wait a second.
SCENE 4
(The food is being served)
M:I ordered the Cappuccino,but what's this?Coca Cola?
W:Exactly,it's Pepsi Cola.
M:I don't care what kind of cola it is,what I want is coffee,not cola!
W:Well,sir,they share the same color.And I think cola tastes better…
C:Great,and rabbit and rat share the same letters.So why don't you give me a rat if I order the rabbit?Jesus!Ridiculous!
A:I can't stand this stupid restaurant and this idiotic waiter any more.Chris,Michael,let's go.
C&M:Right,let's go.
SCENE 5
(Outside the restaurant)
A:I can't believe that is a restaurant.I'd rather say that it's a psychiatric hospital!
M:Yes,that's terrible!How can it survive in the market economics?
C:The important thing is how can it survive in Guangzhou?This city is going to hold the Asian Game in 2010.If there're some more restaurants like this,what will the foreign people think about Guangzhou and China?
A,C&M:(Sigh)

英语搞笑话剧《孔雀东南飞》


Wanderseveryfivemiles
焦仲卿Johnny(Jforshort)刘兰芝Lunch(Lforshort)
焦母Johnny’smother(JMforshort)刘母Lunch’smother(LMforshort)
太守之子Mayor’sson(MSforshort)强盗Burglars(AB...

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英语搞笑话剧《孔雀东南飞》


Wanderseveryfivemiles
焦仲卿Johnny(Jforshort)刘兰芝Lunch(Lforshort)
焦母Johnny’smother(JMforshort)刘母Lunch’smother(LMforshort)
太守之子Mayor’sson(MSforshort)强盗Burglars(ABandC)
(J作被打状跑上台,内砸出一卷纸筒,J被打中,狼狈不堪)
J:EverybodysaysthatI’mhenpecked,butinfact,I’masstrongasatiger,(小声)whilemy
wifeisWuSong.
(指着上台处的门大声道)I’mnotafraidofyou!
(内砸出一脸盆,J接住当成盾牌护着头)Then,I’mafraidofwhom?
MywifeLunchisthemostfamouswomanintheneighbor-hood.Sheisbraverthanme,
smarterthanmeandstrongerthanme.AllthisIdonotcare.Ionlywanthertobetender
thanme.Butsheisnot!Havingawifelikethisisjustlikelivinginthehell!
(内又砸出一卷纸筒,击中J)
MyGod!Whocanhelpme?(下)
Act1
(序幕结束时,JM作窃听状)
JM(拄拐棍上):Ican!
(对门内)Lunch!Lunch!Whereareyou?
L(扎着围裙,拿着锅铲,从门内跳出来):I’mhere!What’supmum?
JM:I’vetoldyouagainandagainthatyoushouldcallme“mymostbeautifulgracefuland
dearestmother-in-law”.
L:OK.Mymostbeautifulgracefulanddearestmother-in-law,what’sup?
JM:Sinceyoumarriedmysonyouhavebehavedsobadly.Youhavebeensorude,sobrusque,so
lazy……
L:But……
JM:Neverinterruptme!
L:Neverinterruptme!SinceImarriedyourson,thatterribleJohnny,Ihavebeenworkinghardall
daylong,cookingandwashing.Ihaveraisedtensofthousandsofpigsandducksandchicken
and……
JM:Butallthoseyouhavedonearenotasvaluableasagrandson!
L(生气地挥动着锅铲):Oh,youwantagrandson,don’tyou?(开始解围裙)Goandaskyour
son.I’mleaving!(扯下围裙,扔在JM的脸上,下)
Act2
(LM坐在台上打毛线,L拿着锅铲上)
L:Mum,I’mback!
LM:Youareback?Why?Whathappened?
L:Iwaskickedoutbymymostbeautifulgracefulanddearestmother–in-law.
LM(惊讶,但随即露出幸灾乐祸的神情):See!Ihavealreadytoldyou!Whenyouinsistedon
marryingthatterribleJohnny,Itoldyouthatheisuglystupidandpoor,butyoudidnotlisten
tome.Lookatyourself……
L:But,mum……
LM:Neverinterruptme!
L:Mum,I’mnotinterruptingyou.IjustwanttotellyouthatyouarealwaysrightOK?And
I’llmarrywhomeveryouwantmeto.
LM(大喜):Nicegirl!Justnow,Imetthemayor’ssoninthemarket.Hesaid:“Ifyoudaughter
Haven’tbeenmarried,Ireallyreallywanttomarryher!”Nowyouarefreeagain,I’llgo
andtellhim.(下)
L(惊愕):What?Themayor’sson?Themostfamousplayboyintheneighbor-hood?(手中的锅
铲掉在地上)WhatasillythingIhavedone!(下)
(J睡眼惺忪上)
J(边走边道):Lunch!Lunch!Wherearemysocks?
(走了几步,在地上捡起袜子)Heretheyare!(闻一下) Er!Howsmelly!Theyarestilldirty!
(突然想起)Lunchhasgone!Ihavetowashthemmyself.
(他的肚子似乎咕咕叫了起来)Oh,I’msohungry!Butthere’snobreakfast!(捡起地上的围
裙)ThisiswhatLunchalwayswears!Imisshersomuch,andherexcellentcookingskill!Now
shehasgone.Ihavetocookformymotherandmyself.
JM(上):Where’smybreakfast?Where’sLunch?Hasn’tshegotupyet?
J:Mum,can’tyouremember?Lunchhasgone!
JM(沉吟片刻):Well,totellyouthetruthJohnny,asonwithoutawifeisuseless.Lunchisanice
girl,goandtakeherback!
J(立正敬礼):Yesmadam!
Act4
(J开心地走着，忽然跳出来三个强盗)
A:Heyyou!Stopandlistentous!
Theroadisbuiltbyme!(抬脚重重地踩在一块大石头上)
B:AndIplantedonetree!(亦抬脚踩在同一块石头上)
C:Ifyouwanttogobythisstreet---(欲踩石头，但踩到了A的脚)
AB&C:Giveusallyourmoney!
J(搜遍了每一个口袋，掏出1角硬币):Is1maoenough?
(三强盗晕倒状，接着三人聚在一边商量)
A:Whatbadluck!Thisguyisbroken!
B:Ifwecannotrobanymoneytoday,wewillhavenothingtoeattonight!
C:Iheardthatthemayor’ssonisgoingtomarryMissLiuLanzhinextmonth.WEcangoand
robthewedding!
A&B:Goodidea!
J(惊讶):What?What?Lunchisgoingtogetmarried?It’simpossible!
AB&C:Why?Aprettygirlandarichman,whatagoodcouple!
J:ButLunchismywife!Wehaven’tgotdivorcedyet!
(突然有了主意)I’vegotanidea!Youaregoingtorobthewedding,don’tyou?I’llgo
withyou.YoutakethemoneyandItakethebride.
B:Haveyougotanyexperience?
J:No.ButI’vegotthis!(J脱下鞋子从里面摸出一张支票，上书＄1，000，000)
(转眼已到了婚礼之期．MS意气风发用红绸牵着新娘上，J盖着红盖头极不情愿地被拉上台)
(J和三强盗跃至台中)
ABC&J:Heyyou!Stopandlistentous!
A:Theroadisbuiltbyme!
B:AndIplantedonetree.
C:Ifyouwanttogobythisstreet---
J:Giveusallyourmoney!
(L听到J的声音，掀起了盖头)
L(惊喜万分):Johnny!(不顾一切地飞奔到J的身边并躲到了的身后)
(MS大怒，挥拳向J打来．J矮身一躲，MS打中了J身后的L，L晕倒)
J(火冒三丈):Howdareyoubeatmywife!（挥拳向MS冲去）
(J与MS混战，JM上，以拐杖击晕MS)
(J将MS胸前的新郎标志扯下戴在自己胸前)
J(扶起L，关切地问):Honey,howareyou?
L(哭状):Ihurtalot!
J:Don’tcrybaby.I’llgoandfetchthemedicine. (下)
L(起身去追):Waitforme! (跑下)
(音乐起 CanYouCelebrate)

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