帮我评价下一篇英语作文这是我预先准备考博英语用的（今年开奥运,有可能考）,麻烦高手帮我评价下,看看有没有错误或者有可以改进的地方,本文大概可以得几分?Share of Spirit of the Olympic Game

帮我评价下一篇英语作文这是我预先准备考博英语用的（今年开奥运,有可能考）,麻烦高手帮我评价下,看看有没有错误或者有可以改进的地方,本文大概可以得几分?Share of Spirit of the Olympic Game
帮我评价下一篇英语作文
这是我预先准备考博英语用的（今年开奥运,有可能考）,麻烦高手帮我评价下,看看有没有错误或者有可以改进的地方,本文大概可以得几分?
Share of Spirit of the Olympic Games
As 2008 Beijing Olympic Games is drawing nearer and nearer,we can feel the special atmosphere of the game everywhere through various forms of Olympic advertisements in television,rodio and newspapers.At the same time we are looking forward to this great international event,it is quite necessary of us to take sometime thinking about the spirit of the Olympic Games as well and what we can learn from it.
Overall speaking,the spirit of the Olympic Games can be characterized by “mutual understanding,friendship,unity and fair play”.Though invisible,Olympic spirit has always played an indispensable role in the Olympic Games throughout its history by encouraging athletes to observe rules of the games,face and compete with strong rivals as well as respect and cooperate with people from other nations.
Since the spirit of mutual understanding,friendship,unity and fair play is in common for everyone of us despite our differences in nationality,career,position and social rank,Olympic spirit is not merely confined to sports and naturally we can share it in other fields and put it into practice in our daily activities.In a word,only by wide spreading and sharing this praiseworthy spirit,can we make greater contributions to Olympic movements ,and perhaps,even the social harmony and development.

帮我评价下一篇英语作文这是我预先准备考博英语用的（今年开奥运,有可能考）,麻烦高手帮我评价下,看看有没有错误或者有可以改进的地方,本文大概可以得几分?Share of Spirit of the Olympic Game
(1)Share of Spirit of the Olympic Games
As 2008 Beijing Olympic Games is drawing nearer and nearer,we can feel the special atmosphere of the (2)game everywhere through various forms of Olympic advertisements (3)in television,(4)rodio and newspapers.At the same time we are looking forward to this great international event,it is quite necessary (5)of us to take (6)sometime (7)thinking about the spirit of the Olympic Games as well and what we can learn from it.
Overall speaking,the spirit of the Olympic Games can be characterized by “mutual understanding,friendship,unity and fair play”.Though invisible,Olympic spirit has always played an indispensable role in the Olympic Games throughout its history by encouraging athletes to observe rules of the games,face and compete (8)with strong rivals as well as respect and cooperate with people from other nations.
Since the spirit of mutual understanding,friendship,unity and fair play is （9）in common for everyone of us despite our differences in nationality,career,position and social rank,Olympic spirit is not merely confined to sports and naturally we can share it in other fields and put it into practice in our daily activities.(10)In a word,only by wide spreading and sharing this praiseworthy spirit,(11)can we make greater contributions to (12)Olympic movements ,and perhaps,even the social harmony and development(13).
这篇文章写得很流畅,要得15分以上应该没问题.既然你提出指正和改进,我就与你探讨探讨吧.
1.既然是标题,应该用sharing 较准确；建议Sharing The Spirit of Olympic Games
2.你指的是奥运会,应该用大写Games,用game会被沦为某一种游戏.
3.你这里表达的意思应该用 on television.
4.radio 的笔误.
5.应该用for us.
6.这里sometime 要分开,否则“一些时间”变成“有时”了.
7.我建议用to think.
8.应该是compete against .
9.应该是in common with.
10.既然不能一个字总结,当然就不能用in a word.建议用In short; In a nutshell.
11.这句话不该用逗号分开.
12.这里应该加the 来明确你指的Olympic movements.
意见仅供参考,希望共勉.

写的不错，我认为大概可以得17分左右

it is quite necessary of us to take sometime thinking, 这句有点怪怪的。我认为把它改成 ...necessary for us to take sometime to think..... 会比较好吧~
总的来说，写得很好噢~~~ 会有大概17到19分吧~

mbvhg

18.1