英语达人,帮忙修改下.Why did you choose our university?Firstly,shanghai is one of the chinese cities with a large concentration of universities,and I wannor to be a professional management manager in the future in this city.Secondly, XX unive

英语达人,帮忙修改下.Why did you choose our university?Firstly,shanghai is one of the chinese cities with a large concentration of universities,and I wannor to be a professional management manager in the future in this city.Secondly, XX unive
英语达人,帮忙修改下.
Why did you choose our university?
Firstly,shanghai is one of the chinese cities with a large concentration of universities,and I wannor to be a professional management manager in the future in this city.
Secondly, XX university is among the list of projiect 211 for top national universities.And in the management college ,there are so many outstanding professors and teachers.I would be honored to study at this school.

英语达人,帮忙修改下.Why did you choose our university?Firstly,shanghai is one of the chinese cities with a large concentration of universities,and I wannor to be a professional management manager in the future in this city.Secondly, XX unive
Why did you choose our university?
Firstly,shanghai is one of the chinese cities with a large concentration of universities,and I want to be a professional manager in near future in this city.
Secondly, XX university is among top national universities of projiect 211.And in the management school ,there are many outstanding professors and teachers.I would be honored to study here.
低级错误 不谢

Why did I choose the university?
Firstly,shanghai is one of the cities in china within a large number of universities,and I want to be a professional Administrator in the future in this city.

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Why did I choose the university?
Firstly,shanghai is one of the cities in china within a large number of universities,and I want to be a professional Administrator in the future in this city.
Secondly, XX university is one among the list of projiect 211 for top national universities.And in the management college ,there are so many outstanding professors and teachers.I would be honored to study at this school.

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Firstly,shanghai is one of the cities which located by many universities in China.And I want to be a professional manager of management area in future here.
Secondly, XX university is aon the l...

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Firstly,shanghai is one of the cities which located by many universities in China.And I want to be a professional manager of management area in future here.
Secondly, XX university is aon the list of projiect 211 for top national universities.there are many outstanding professors and teachers in the management college..It is my great honor to study at this school.

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shanghai is one of the chinese
不能one of the chinese
谢谢

Why did you choose our university?
Firstly, shanghai is one of the chinese cities with a large concentration of universities and colleges, and I wanna be a professional managerial manager in this ...

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Why did you choose our university?
Firstly, shanghai is one of the chinese cities with a large concentration of universities and colleges, and I wanna be a professional managerial manager in this city in the future.
Secondly, XX university is among the list of projiect 211 for top national universities.And in the management department, there are so many outstanding professors and lecturers. it would be my honour to study in this school.
不用谢了， 希望对你有所帮助。
一定要注意时间状语和地点状语的先后顺序，相信语感好的同志一读过去就感觉不顺，是不是？
in the future 一定要在in this city 的后面。

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