【高分求批改作文】托福TPO11的综合写作.TPO11:Some people say that the Internetprovides people with a lot of available information.Others think access to somuch information creates problems.Which view do you agree with? 除了指出语

来源:学生作业帮助网 编辑:六六作业网 时间:2024/11/22 06:22:30
【高分求批改作文】托福TPO11的综合写作.TPO11:SomepeoplesaythattheInternetprovidespeoplewithalotofavailableinformation

【高分求批改作文】托福TPO11的综合写作.TPO11:Some people say that the Internetprovides people with a lot of available information.Others think access to somuch information creates problems.Which view do you agree with? 除了指出语
【高分求批改作文】托福TPO11的综合写作.
TPO11:Some people say that the Internetprovides people with a lot of available information.Others think access to somuch information creates problems.Which view do you agree with?

 除了指出语法错误外还要重点批改下文章的结构立意等.

【高分求批改作文】托福TPO11的综合写作.TPO11:Some people say that the Internetprovides people with a lot of available information.Others think access to somuch information creates problems.Which view do you agree with? 除了指出语
第一句的句式不错,可以设为模板.开头段没有问题.
第一段,make .could surf,把could去掉
severely affect 改为adversely affect
unhealthy staffs,是stuffs
play a bad impact 改成exert a bad impact
第三段,striped 改为 stripped
he did this just for a joke he 改为 they
too hard for us把for us去掉
最后unless那半句多余
第四段I am not trying to 多余
第五段telling ability不太地道.
大问题没有,立意,论述都ok,时间允许的话,可以再将2,3段论述加强一下,现在感觉development差一些.另外,你是不是考过gre的?感觉你的句子有点凑字数的嫌疑,表达要清晰,简短,最好长短句结合.
就这些了,感觉写的还是很好的.

我托福写作28分,可以发成绩单为证,如果你愿意采纳我的话我给你邮箱,咱们用邮箱改。double-edged sword一看就是电子词典查出来的,美国没有人这么说的I promise, 一般表现有好有坏像一把双刃剑都会说 Every coin has two sides。像中式英语能避免就尽量避免,因为评分员都是按照美国思维和表达方式来打分的。...

全部展开

我托福写作28分,可以发成绩单为证,如果你愿意采纳我的话我给你邮箱,咱们用邮箱改。double-edged sword一看就是电子词典查出来的,美国没有人这么说的I promise, 一般表现有好有坏像一把双刃剑都会说 Every coin has two sides。像中式英语能避免就尽量避免,因为评分员都是按照美国思维和表达方式来打分的。

收起

【高分求批改作文】托福TPO11的综合写作.TPO11:Some people say that the Internetprovides people with a lot of available information.Others think access to somuch information creates problems.Which view do you agree with? 除了指出语 新托福作文求批改~ 跪求托福作文批改~拜托拜托~~~~~~~~~~~! 求托福作文批改谁能帮我批改一下托福作文啊? 【高分求批改作文】托福TPO12的独立写作.TPO12:It is better to have broad knowledgeof many academic subjects than to specialize in one specific subject. 最近写作文总是觉得前面写的比较松,后面就写的特别仓促.求大 求托福高分作文 李笑来的文本格式 托福作文求批改~最好是有托福作文高分经验的仁兄,题目是tpo23的In today’s world,it is more important to work quickly and risk making mistakes than to work slowly and make sure that everything is correct.Use specific reasons an 托福综合写作作文 求批改 求拍~求给意见~· TPO2的综合写作According to the listening material,the man claims that group work can not bring the advances stated by the reading passage.Equipped with lots of demerits,working as a team 托福的综合作文需要怎么提高? 求托福的综合写作!我不知道怎么写可以的高分,小作文:reading 讲的是:一个画家P发明了一种画法,then在2003年的时候发现了二十几幅类似的画,大家就猜测这个画是不是他画的,reading主要说明 求李笑来托福高分作文综合写作部分音频,请发到[email protected],谢谢 托福作文的综合写作应该怎么写?我看网上都说托福的综合写作像八股文,那么怎么个八股法?结构固定? 求托福高分作文(或范文)(要有点评) 求托福李笑来高分作文185篇mp3音频文件. 求托福独立作文十大高分句式? 怎么写出高分雅思作文请问雅思作文怎么写高分啊?我的做分是5分...长时间得不到提高..练习了也没什么效果..可能是没老师的批改..我很郁闷作文这么难提升.. 求托福TPO1的综合写作作文批改In the lecture,the professorcasts doubt on the reading passage`s idea that offering employees the four-dayworking option may increase the company`s economy and employees` life quality.The professor asserts that 托福TPO1的综合作文,求批改1 细节 2 point出来了没 3 格式上可以吗?In the lecture,the professor casts doubt on the point of the reading passage that four-day workweek has a beneficial effect on the country ,companies and individuals